You Get More with Honey than with Vinegar, and Other Lessons from the Bus

Ever errupt in giggles after you do something kind of silly and awkward, and then feel a tremendous need to admit just how awkward you were to anyone and everyone in a public forum?

Enter, having a blog.

So, last night I pretended to know someone on the bus (who thought they knew me)

because I was too afraid of hurting their feelings if I acknowledged that I did not, 

in fact, have any clue who they were.  

Or worse, see their cheeks blush pink with embarrassment

as they realized that they had waved down a complete stranger.

So instead, I thought the smartest thing to do would be to 'channel' this person they were mistaking me for.

I don't know how I get myself in these situations, but I do.

At one point, I tried to inch my way to the back of the bus

and remove myself from the conversation- I really did.

But, I must graciously thank you, Goddess of Awkward Scenarios,

you arranged for the woman sitting next to the girl on the bus

to get up right as I tried to pop my headphones back in and excuse myself.

Oh, the tangled web you weave!

So there I was, nodding along in conversations about my charming boyfriend,

(don't have one)

and swapping stories about our weekends in Tahoe,

(have yet to go)

giggling about the party a few weeks back,

(pretty sure my best friend was visiting and I most certainly, was not, at a party)

and trying to ask generic, yet slightly personal questions

that might lead me to a clue- an inkling- of who this girl was.

You just moved, right?

(Um, no...)

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Sure, I felt uncomfortable... but, wait a tick! This is kind of like a conversational scavenger hunt!

What sentence would lead me to the next clue? What fun fact could I unearth next?

I was just settling into my new persona when it happened.

The realization swept over her face as if she'd seen a ghost.

 She quickly looked down and fidgeted with her phone.

The conversation ceased.

It got quiet.

Crickets, people. Crickets.

My face turned hot and I started racking my brain for something, anything, to talk about.

Why, why,why from the beginning did I not just dismiss her wave with a friendly, "Oh no, I think you have the wrong person?"

After what felt like hours, we approached her stop and as she excused herself to get up,

I hung onto my last piece of pride and squealed, "It was so good  to bump into you again!"

I'll admit it.

I kind of felt like a creep for going along with it.

But, I don't think I'd change my instincts.

I could've coldy stared past her.

But then she'd be wondering all night why the girl she thought she knew, was so icy and mean.

That'd be terrible, people!

So yes, I maintain that you always, always,

get more with honey

than with vinegar.

Even if it leaves you feeling a little batty.

xo